Things isn't smooth today. Not abit. Tough going through it. Somehow or another, my heart's hurting badly. Whether i like it or not. I can't seem to be able to control the pain. Was thinking of you during the paper. How am i supposed to live through 3 days? Can I just stay home and shut myself? No. I can't. Paper was bad. You didn't turn up. Everything is screwed up. Everything is fucked up.
Sweet loving escape.
1:17 PM
Saturday, May 29, 2004
well well, seems like i'm dead for chinese. It's two more days to the big O and I'm still not done yet. Ok, I'll not meantion done, I'm not even half way done yet! Ok, what am I doing online then? I'm not sure, I think i just need to relax for a while I guess? But wait, I don't think there's time for me to relax now right? Ha. I'm going nuts thinking about chinese words. I swear I don't want to repeat my Chinese Os. I don't want to go through the same shit again. In November. Argh.. I'm not looking forward to June hols. Tuition would be starting, self-studying have to begin. Argh.. I'm dying.. TOTALLY.
Sweet loving escape.
12:35 AM
Friday, May 28, 2004
Treating my school like it's my grandfather's.Been in and out of school as and when i like. This is bad. Going for the mass tomorrow, wonder how would it be like. Going to school early in the morning on Sat to get my report book. Sigh, not a good sign. Oh well, what can i say? Try harder next time. Seriously, i hope i would be strong enough to resist all temptations during the June Holidays and study hard. At least i might stand a better chance improving. Don't you think?
Went to Sentosa with baby on Tuesday, it was alright. I didn't know those people there, except 2? It was her class chalet, but baby insisted that she wants me there. Took the most shaky train in my life after that, is it called the Monorail? I don't know. Wednesday? Can't exactly remember what i did. Oh well, what's new, I've got an A drive memory.
I need to study, I really need to. It's my Chinese on Monday and I'm still not half way through. I'm dead. But I'm scared to study at night now, no more table lamp. darn. Oh well, hope the paper would be easy and that the marks would be morderated. Then maybe i can score a decent grade at least. Let's see, hopefully a B something? I'm not greedy to want an A, just a B and I'll be happy.
Need to do something about my Physics, Biology, English, Maths and Accounts. These are the few subjects that don't need much memory. I'm counting on them. ha.
I'm leading a very lonely life now. I think i need to bury my head in my books before i start thinking so much. Don't you think so? I mean my memory space may be small, but my imaginary space is HUGE and i mean HUGE. I'm going crazy soon thinking about extraordinary things.
Oh! Went to Pasar Malam today. Fun. Ate not quite alot, but going really full. Spent quite abit there too. Meeting Gwen, Cass in Tp tomorrow to go over to the church for mass. As for now, i shall go off and try my guts. To try and study. Ha.
Ta!
Sweet loving escape.
12:22 AM
Sunday, May 23, 2004
woke up at 8 plus to get ready to meet baby for breakfast.
yum.
she came over to my house after that to sleep.
ha.
i went to watch the princess show, sadly, it's the last today.
sob. no more show to watch next week.
blah.
after that, went to people's park with my mum.
the weather is out to kill people.
haha..
got lots of thing.
mum spent a total of 100 over there.
but not really happy with what i bought though.
ha. never mind, i shall not be mean.
anyway, i didn't use up all 100 there.
she bought things for my bro, sis, and the house.
hmm.
went to macs to eat ice cream,
mum can't eat solid food due to her teeth.
so went to eat ice cream.
she couldn't eat the cone.
after which went home.
reached home at 6 plus.
went to bathe, then pack my room abit.
finally, i felt tired, i went to bed.
i woke up about an hour ago,
went to eat,
call baby,
ah!
i'm going crazy.
bah.
Sweet loving escape.
9:52 PM
pissed off.
big time.
fuck the god damn world.
irritant.
i hate this world.
i totally hate it.
Sweet loving escape.
1:14 AM
pissed off.
big time.
fuck the god damn world.
irritant.
i hate this world.
i totally hate it.
Sweet loving escape.
1:14 AM
Thursday, May 20, 2004
home.
school was somehow not so bad?
i don't know why actually.
tomorrow's going to be real bad.and i mean bad.
i'll be checking some of my papers tomorrow.
gosh.
hope my efforts get paid off.
really hope so.
blah.
baby's working.
i'm alone. at home. hoping to get some rest.
but somehow, i'm not quite tired.
anyhow, i'll just rest. then i'll study while waiting.
-burps-
Sweet loving escape.
2:30 PM
Wednesday, May 19, 2004
i'm home.
not going to school tomorrow.
school's boring.
blah.
watched van helsing today.
it was good.
totally good and worth your money!
gosh.
there's a show mean girl.
i am going to watch!
one way or another.
i don't care if there's exams or what.
i am going to watch!
i think it's going to be the typical chick flick.
gosh gosh gosh!
ha.
i'm going mad.
mad mad mad!
ta!
Sweet loving escape.
1:27 AM
Monday, May 17, 2004
went to school today.
it was supposed to be marking day, but still went for mock paper.
almost died.
i don't even understand why i go anyway.
ha.
went to eat cal's mum's prawn mee.
-yummy-
hee.
am supposed to sleep, but i guess i don't feel like.
i think i want to spend more time with my baby instead of sleeping.
yups.
ta!
Sweet loving escape.
2:42 PM
Saturday, May 15, 2004
it's sat and i'm home.
eating my breakfast(it's 1pm by the way:))
waiting for dearest baby to wake up.
should i go study?
but i only enjoy 1 day..
sigh, yes i know, Os are coming.
oh well, i'll see if i feel like studying.
bored. shall go to yahoo to check calories level in food.
ta!
Sweet loving escape.
12:59 PM
Thursday, May 13, 2004
wee hee!
rejoyce!
the mids ended today.
my eyes were shutting throughout the day.
yesterday was such a bad day for baby and i.
oh well, like i always say,
"all will be fine"
:) thanks baby for telling me things you never did.
thanks alot.
thought that accounts paper was going to be real difficult.
but well, i still could do some.
just that my balance sheet can't balance*whats new*
anyway, i think i should stop talking about the accounts paper.
hmm, i guess i'll rest today, study tomorrow for chinese mock.
then take the mock paper on monday (if i can wake up),
then continue studying.
then here goes!
my chinese O levels.
Sweet loving escape.
2:52 PM
Wednesday, May 12, 2004
blah.
my baby's asleep.
trying to catch up on her dearest sleep.
oh well.
what can i do?
blah.
the weather is freaking warm these few days.
please god, give me some clouds and some wind.
to sl(if you ever read), thanks for all the tutoring.
thanks.
:)
anyway, i'm taking my last paper for mids tomorrow.
accounts.-sulks-
never mind, not as if i can rest after accounts.
my chinese Os are coming in 20 something days i guess.
blah.
so have to study again?
so boring.
i'm perspiring like a mad dog now.
going in to my room soon for some aircon.
gosh.
Sweet loving escape.
5:59 PM
Saturday, May 08, 2004
blah.
i'm halfway done with my mids.
disgusting.
the papers are really tough.
so what am i going to do?
since the studying does not pay off?
am i wasting my efforts?
am i wasting my energy?
i don't know.
i want to do well.
do really well.
but i can't.
can i?
Sweet loving escape.
12:33 AM
THE ONE
deborah
bisexual
turning 20 on 17th Decemeber Ngee Ann Polytechnic School of Film and Media Studies myspace. ::
friendster.::
