I am this bored at home that I'm blogging twice today. - Not that I have entirely nothing to do but just that I'm feeling alone tonight. It's just one of those nights again. Thinking about this one of those nights again makes me irritated by myself. ): Feeling so lonely made me go onto friendster and look at old friend's friendster account. Yes. I know friendster is so off. I'm bored. So shoot me. ): - Reading her blog makes me upset. I don't know. No. I'm not trying to sympathize her and think that hey I'm the winner here(*roll eyes). There's just simply no such thing as winner or loser. Just girls out there being girls. Having girls problems having girls shit. I wonder if there's anything I can do to maybe not help her but at least ease her. But I doubt it. I might be at fault here though I'm not really sure where did I go wrong. Wondering if I handled things differently, perhaps she wouldn't feel so painful within. Perhaps there might be some cushion available for her somehow somewhere. Crying every night just wouldn't help. I've cried before and I know how awful that feeling is so I don't see the reason why any other girls should feel this way. Just hope she'll feel better soon. Friend of mine, friend of hers, should you be reading this, do help her along. (I don't really think we share many common friends though.) -
Sweet loving escape.
11:52 PM
It's been a relatively long day for me. School and work. No play. That's how my life's been these days. ): With more projects coming up in school, with the project I hardly have time to rest if I want to spend time with AJ. ): Went to Bokufilms today. Had a mini walk and interview. Interesting how we got lost in cantonment rd and how we walked the entirely opposite from the location. Haha. To make things worse, it started raining. Haha! Went to Maxwell after that to eat with my group mate. (: FUN! Haha. We talked rubbish, talked sense (I didn't contribute much to the conversation though) but it was fun. Went back to school after that to do the coloring of our scripts then head to class. Head straight to work and I refuse to comment anything about it. Met kane and Juan for the ride back to tpy then I head home. Wanted to stay out later today but I doubt I should. I think I should just stay home and rest. Shit tired. Working at the handphone shop tomorrow. I kindna can't wait. Just think that though it might be boring, but I don't need to bother about anyone else or anything. Just need to do my own things and everything will be ok! Soon before I know it, my day would have ended. (: -- Things happened recently that I think caused more than just me to be unhappy. Just hope that everything would be for the better from now onwards. (:
Sweet loving escape.
10:39 PM
Monday, November 20, 2006
There are a few things I am looking forward to now. 1. Christmas(*roll eyes. like who isn't) 2. School break 3. My birthday 4. Phathom of the Opera (theatre) 5. Batam Trip 6. Project end - Running into this major attendance problem. Seems like last sem was worse but my mood was not much affected. This sem seems worse. Though I'm running into the same attendance problem, but I am angry with myself. Why can't I wake up on time. Why can't I pull myself to school on time. Why can't I hear the alarm? WHY WHY! UGH. People are leaving halfway before the end of the project. I wonder why. ): Uploading pictures soon!
Sweet loving escape.
8:58 PM
Saturday, November 18, 2006
I don't know how to react when things just pop up at my face just like that. School, Work, Personal. - Even though I hardly want to have any relationship with you. Seeing that on your blog made my heart sink. It was ouch. But I'm not going to walk up to you, say a sorry or fake a smile. The best I can do perhaps is just perhaps one day, we meet up in school. I'm smile to you. Or maybe say a Hi. But doubt I'll see you again. Not sure if I want to see you. If I do, I'm pretty sure that guilt is over whelming me within and I need to get it out. But I can't do anything. I just simply don't know you and I just simply can't understand your doings. I'm a female who will get jealous. Maybe not as much but I do. Maybe I just need to understand why all these are happening. Maybe.
Sweet loving escape.
1:44 AM
Saturday, November 11, 2006
I finally bought OTO trimax. (: Was using it a while ago. I swear it feels funny. Used it for a whole 40 min. (: Thanks people for bothering to tag on my board. (: Thanks. Work has been killing me quite a bit. But hang in there. There's only 2 weeks of production left. Then there's about 2 weeks of post. Just hang in there. Just one more month. (: Came back from a bbq session with ju, min and zhen. Fun meeting them after a while. Just fun. (: I've no idea what to blog about anymore. So ya. Waiting for AJ to end work and then I'll be able to call her.
Sweet loving escape.
1:23 AM
Saturday, November 04, 2006
Thinking of closing my blog down. Since currently I've been so super busy and no one seems to be reading my blog. Not that I really want unneccesary people to read my blog, but it's just one of the days that I feel I have no important stand in the society. I've been busy at work and school. Have not been able to wake up for school. Things got so bad that my mother thought I was on drugs thats why I am sleeping so much recently. She just don't happen to see her daughter up at 4 plus in the morning doing her work. UGH. Anyhow, since the crew have started filming, I've been a little slack. Just that I have to come up with a weekly report and deal with people who are not willing to sign their contracts as well as giving out their pay. OH! I've received my first cheque from Oak3. (: Though I'm not exactly delighted. Oh well. School work is accumulating. With more than one projects coming up, I honestly feel like I have no time for myself. Poor AJ have to come to and fro from my house just to be able to spend pathetic time with me. Most of the time would be spent sleeping. This is honestly straining our relationship. Also, we are both having bad vibes about our relationship every week. This does not look too good too. Oh well. I just want to earn money as well as experience. If everything goes well, I would have to go for attachment next sem. I'm quite looking for it. It just means another production project coming up. (: Though as an intern I'm going to be paid pathetically. But I don't know. The experience perhaps. Haha. I'm still thinking of furthering my studies. I don't know?
Sweet loving escape.
1:31 AM
THE ONE
deborah
bisexual
turning 20 on 17th Decemeber Ngee Ann Polytechnic School of Film and Media Studies myspace. ::
friendster.::
